12 Days of Stress Relief During the Holiday Season
The holidays may bring lot's of joy, fun, peace, and memory making experiences. However, it often brings added stress and anxiety along with it. The seasonal change of weather, day light changes, and overall hustle and bustle busyness leaves us feeling tired more often, and maybe a bit more sensitive to stress.
I'm going to share with you 12 tips on how to reduce holiday stress, and I chose 12 because well, going with the holiday theme of "12 days of Christmas....!".
1. Let's talk about boundaries. I often talk about boundaries in my therapy sessions, as many of us (more often women, however men struggle too), with "saying no." This includes to yourself or someone else. One way you can practice saying no, is when you get asked to do something, attend an event, or participate and you aren't quite sure you want to, or can actually go, try saying something like, "let me check my calendar and get back to you." This simple practice allows space for you to think it through, and have an out to not commit to it. Another option is just to say, "I'm practicing saying, no, and I'm not able or not interested to attend, however thanks or asking." It may sound simple, or it may feel daunting to do. If it feels daunting practice with you partner, a friend who you can feel comfortable being vulnerable and silly with, or write out the scenario, or rehearse in your mind. Athletes rehearse their performance mentally over and over, and it's been scientifically proven to help improve their performance. It works, give it a try!
2. Time & Scheduling Boundaries. How often do you find yourself writing a list of to do's and not even thinking about is this realistic? It then leads you down a path of running around trying to accomplish it all, and then feeling defeated or beating yourself up because you didn't get it all done. Try "scheduling" yourself for self-care time, even if that means quiet alone time, or more family time at home. It may include scheduling in a meal time if you are one of those that forgets to eat. Sometimes the most simplistic changes actually help us to realize we need to make a small change to have a huge impact. If you aren't sure where to change your schedule, try tracking for a day, or a week what you do each day. Yep,you read that right, it's the famous time management self-study, I'm suggesting you try because it actually works by helping us become more mindfully aware of where we spend our time. When we are aware, we then can reflect and make changes that we desire. Alternatively, we may recognize it has to be this way, and then we can practice giving ourselves permission to feel this way.
3. Mindful Eating. Everyone has seasonal foods, or fun foods that we love to eat during the holidays. It may feel intimidating giving yourself permission to eat that favorite food, for fear you will over indulge. However, if we deprive ourselves we will actually end up over eating it when we do eat it, or eat something similar. So it's actually a more effective strategy to start with being mindfully aware, eating routine consistent meals, and then giving yourself permission to thoroughly enjoy through your 5 senses the favorite fun food. Give it a try today!
4. Gratitude Practices. We've all heard about how negativity breeds more negativity and it's true. I like to think of it like we are exercising that part of our brain, when we think negatively, we continue to strengthen that thinking pathway in our brains. So, it can feel unnatural and difficult to think positively, or express gratitude when that pathway of our brains is "weak", however we also know we can strengthen it with practice. Research has shown us that we have the best chance at exercising positive thinking and gratitude if we start off each day with it upon waking up. If you forget, because well life is busy let's embrace reality, then try taking a few moments once you arrive at work, or when eating a meal to express gratitude about something. Gratitude can be simple like, "I'm grateful for having heat in my office or home." It can include being grateful for having a friend that's supportive, or grateful for the sunshine being outside. Get creative with your gratitude, and even take it a step further to write it down, so that in the future you can reflect on all the positive thinking you did.
5. Pay it Forward with Kindness. We have all seen this, or heard about this on the news, the internet, social media. It's true paying it forward, or being kind to someone, even a stranger can be so helpful in boosting our mood and helping us feel less stressed. If you find yourself struggling financially, then don't fret just yet, you can pay it forward with kindness through making eye contact and smiling at a stranger, or maybe even your neighbor. Then observe, and reflect for a few seconds on how that felt for you. Did you feel an ounce of joy? Awkwardness? Or feeling motivated to try it again...!
6. Volunteer to help out. Whether you want to volunteer to help out with a holiday event, a school event for your child, or just something in your community it can help you feel more connected to your community. It gives you a sense of meaning and belonging. This is important to feeling less lonely and less isolated. If you are too busy to make a commitment, what about volunteering to help a family member or friend when they are sick, or helping them wrap gifts to give out, for some examples. The idea is to volunteer when it's convenient for you, and this may mean helping out at a social event with setting up or cleaning up afterwards. One small step of helping can help everyone involved feel more connected, appreciated, and supported.
7. Go to bed a little earlier even if it's one night each week. As a fast paced, busy culture we often find ourselves running on less and less sleep trying to fit in everything in a day. Especially if you are an entrepreneur, or have young children. Sleep is vital to feeling rested, energized, and less sensitive to stressful situations. We probably can all related to feeling a little more on edge, or grumpy when we are lacking sleep. So try setting a reminder to go to bed even 5 minutes earlier, or 30 minutes earlier one night a week. A small change like this, maybe all that's manageable however, it's also a positive one degree of change.
8. Eat 3 meals, and 3 snacks per day. When life gets busy, we may feel stressed, worried, or just forget to eat. Eating regularly at consistent intervals each day helps our body to have the proper nutrition, and energy to be able to manage our mood, feel less sensitive to stressful situations, and "less hangry!" If you feel unsure where to start, maybe start with carrying a protein bar, or a piece of fruit with you to eat on the go. Small steps can help us feel like it's more manageable, less overwhelming, and when we feel the difference we can feel more motivated to do more.
9. Schedule something enjoyable for after the holidays. Want to avoid feeling the downward spiral after the holidays? Then consider scheduling a day off from work if possible, or schedule a vacation, set a new goal to work towards, or seek out a new hobby. These are some ideas to help you get started with trying something new an different, and when we finish the holidays, we often feel initially relieved, still riding on the happy feelings of the holidays, and then suddenly we feel down, and on edge since winter leaves us feeling dark, cold, and with less energy. Giving yourself something to look forward to, or something new to try can help you look forward and feel excited.
10. Create a self-care jar. Include in it different ways to de-stress, take care of you, and don't forget to include ways that you have fun, and enjoy life too. You can use a box, or a jar, and leave it simple, or make it really fancy. It's up to your preference. The idea is that you can write down different ways that you can cope with stress, relax, and have fun, then fold each piece of paper, and place in the self-care jar. Each day choose at least one thing to do. If you choose something that's not realistic for that day then schedule a time do it in the near future. Make sure you put this jar or box someone that is visible daily to prompt you to do it too.
11. Engage in relaxation: either yoga or meditation. Yoga and meditation are common ways that we hear to de-stress. It's true both yoga and meditation offer amazing health benefits. Consider joining a yoga class or meditation class. Unsure if it's a fit, try looing up the available free library of resources on You Tube, or going to the library to see if they offer any classes upcoming to try it out too. It doesn't have to be costly to try something new, and who knows, you may just enjoy it.
12. Ask someone you know, about how they relax and de-stress, then try out what they suggest. All too often we have available supports that we don't access. When we ask a friend, or someone we trust about how they cope, or manage stress they may share an idea that we haven't thought of yet, or they remind us of something we were doing and then stopped doing it. When we have a buddy to help hold us accountable to change, it often keeps us on track to being consistent with our practices. When we do things together, with someone else we also feel less alone in the process, motivating us to do it as well.
If you found this helpful, please share it with others who can also benefit from the tips. If you need more support CLICK HERE to schedule a meeting with Shelley!
